Prepare to be star-struck, football fans, as England’s Women’s World Cup squad has taken an otherworldly turn by recruiting a team composed entirely of celestial bodies and cosmic entities. As the tournament approaches, it’s clear that the competition will be out of this world, quite literally.

Led by Captain Cometella, a seasoned star with experience in intergalactic tournaments, the team boasts a lineup that includes the likes of Solar Serena, Nebula Nadine, and Galaxy Gigi – all shining luminously on and off the field.

Coach Celestia Luminary, known for her unconventional coaching methods and knack for harnessing cosmic energy, revealed the reasoning behind this unique approach: “We’ve decided to take a literal interpretation of ‘stellar players.’ Our celestial squad represents the true essence of unity, cooperation, and also a bit of extraterrestrial magic.”

Naysayers argue that the team’s reliance on the cosmic arts could lead to questionable results on the pitch. “While I appreciate the star power, I’m not sure how well solar flares and lunar phases will translate into effective corner kicks,” remarked Dr. Soccerologist, a football analyst.

However, Coach Luminary remains confident in her approach. “Our pre-game rituals include harmonizing with the planets and harnessing the gravitational force for precise headers,” she explained. “Besides, the opposition won’t know what hit them – or rather, what soared above them.”

As the Women’s World Cup approaches, fans around the world are both intrigued and bewildered by England’s celestial team. Supporters are already practicing their moonwalk celebrations and star-shaped hand gestures in preparation for the matches.

“It’s inspiring to see players who literally shine on the field,” gushed one young fan, clutching her replica meteor shower jersey. “I’m just hoping we can see a meteoric rise to victory!”

Whether the celestial all-stars will leave their competitors dazzled or simply lost in space remains to be seen. Regardless, the Women’s World Cup is set to be an event of cosmic proportions, where gravity-defying goals and ethereal assists become the norm. So, keep your eyes on the skies and your telescopes ready – because this tournament is about to launch women’s football into the stratosphere.